je leverai les yeux a toi.

Something my friend Lindsay posted earlier today.

"Why do we live for anything but Him? Why do we chase things that are meaningless? Why do we run for things that'll kill us in the end? Why do we keep our focus on death?

Why can't we live for what we should? Why can't we run after Him with everything we have?

Oh but we can!

Why do we choose to look the other way? Why do we choose to be ignorant? Why do we choose to hold on? Why do we choose to care? Why do we choose to follow the world... even if we say we're not? Why do we fall, and stay there, instead of getting back up? Why can't we be bigger then ourselved? We never live for anything but ourselves, and i don't understand it. We're all human, we aren't perfect, but... we can strive for that.

We can put ourselves behind us, and run for the cross.

Weekend works

There's a Heartache Over the Rainbow

With every passing step she took
I knew she'd never give a look
Back the way from which she came
Her life she thought best to begin again

"The ship set sail that faithful day
And holding on, her mighty claim
That would speak of fairy tales
About her life, amist the gales

She never thought herself ordinary
A prince or king she thought she'd marry
So she left behind a common life
Only to become a sailors wife

And her one true love she left behind
Would not last long, with her gone he died
But a single tear he never shed
On wings of angels is how fled

Over the rainbow, to heaven above
To only one he really loved."



Untitled

"There's this joy in my heart that I wish I could hide
Because after joy shortly follows is pain
And try as I might to relish the moment
The tide comes in and my shattered heart washes into the sea.

And I pour myself out, to a God I can't see
Asking to fix my brokenness, and put my frantic mind at ease

Colaspsed on the shore, I feel joy returning
And I hold on too tightly
For the tide starts it's churning

A whisper is shared, with the sea coming in
My heart now restored, as my joys swept away. "

A song about a girl. Who found God... and then vanished

How could I consider letting go
Of the light, that I seen, inside her grow
To a woman, whose love you chose to show
And the grace that touched her heart.

To me you lead her wanting
For a truth, to her seemed new
And my heart leapt of prayers answered
Of the girl I always knew

But alas our time was fleeting
And she's sailed a different course
But can I just turn and leave her
My heartbeats with more remorse

...And... I'd already fallen in love...

"Forgive Me" were the only words they read...

"Reconciliation!
I hope to find through my confession
Accept this as a demonstration of love."

My Sin has a hold of Me

"What must it take for me to prove
Holy and righteous, unblemeshed to you?

But the stain on my heart runs deep within
A sick twist crimson, in the form of my sin.

Yet the only one who can take my blame
Is the very one I've put to shame.

So I hide myself from the very one
Who no matter how I try, I can't escape from.

I wish, so sincere, but a strong will I lack
And I run to whore, who's knife's in my back."

Bell of the Ball

When she enters the room
She makes every head turn
She's the Bell of the ball
She the fairest of all

But tonight is the night
With her target in sight
She'll not wait another moment
For Mr. Right to blow it

She's calling the shots
And taking her chances
While the other girls mock
And return to their dances

But she won't be dismayed
She's made up her mind
And the whole town will talk
But oh what a find

With courage in hand
And hope in her heart
She approaches the man
But has no place to start...

Confusion aside
She takes him aside
"I'm in love" she exclaims
With a smile real wide.

Back Doors Lead to Secrets

She walks into the room with presence of importance
And from my dark little corner I stare... just a moment to long

But she walks on by...

And I return to my beer, as she exits from the rear...

But for just one moment I sensed it in the air
That there was more that just happened here...

Not that I'll ever know

November Rain

She turns to me and smiles
With a look she only gives me
And I wrap my arounds her
Never wanting to let go
And her deep blue eyes search through me
So I look down to meet her gaze
And we stand embraced for hours
In the cool November rain.

I woke up inspired

Various writings throughout the day.

“Death on the Mind”

Thought after though rolled around in my head
But the one at the front was I wish she was dead.




“To Love an Orphan”

Oh little girl, in her room all alone
In the little orphanage, that you call a home.
Out the window you stare, with hope in your eyes
Praying that today, you’d be this family’s worthwhile.

A quick check in the cracked mirror
To make sure your hair straight
With your pretty red dress on
You head down the stairs to greet.

An old man and his old wife
Sit quietly on the couch
And with a gentle smile
You silently approach

A word or two is shared
Between you and this dear couple
And then you’re escorted
So they can chat a while

Worry crowds your head
And you begin to fear the worst
When in walks the old lady
And your stomach starts to lurch

She reaches down to touch
Your sun stroked golden hair
Then puts her arms around you
And whispers “Please come home my dear.”

With joy you start to cry
And say a simple prayer
Thanking God your sending
Little girls like you his favor.




“If It’s Over, Say It’s Over”

Months pass, and I’m began to get the sense
That she’s long since gotten over me.
But how could that be?

It seems like only yesterday
When conversation came naturally
And we’d sit and talk about spiritual things
But she’s long since spent anytime at all
Trying to hold court with me about just anything.

And I’d give up hope
But I prayed to God
That if she’s still around
Then she’d just drop a line.
(isn’t it funny when you ask God for something, he answers?)

Then she gives me a call, just to say hi
And I throw up my hands and think
“God why?”

But secretly I smile and wait for the day
When my precious friend
Comes home to stay.




“Father, Savior, King”

Lifestyle fragmentation on the floor
And I couldn’t have ever asked for more
Then a loving Father, Savior, King
Whatever you are, you’re just right for me

You walked into the room and put the pieces together
Of my poor broken heart, I couldn’t do better
Then a loving Father, Savior, King
Whoever you are, thanks for saving me.

New Work

I did a little writing today.


"The God and the Devil are Raging Inside Me"

here was a lock on the door but you kicked it in
And I said "HELL NO! I won't let you win!"

But the devil himself came thru the front door
And started to wreak havoc all over my heart.

And I cried and tried to defeat him myself
But oh did Satan defeat me with my own doubt.

So I prayed to the Lord to take back control
And get rid of the best who had his hold

And the Lord to me, oh precious one
This may take some time before it's done.

"Oh my God, that's fine with me
As long as the end product is victory."

And the war began between God and the Devil
Over my heart, which I couildn't defend.

But the promise remains,
Jesus Wins!


"The One Who Almost Went Astray"

Hope had never seemed so far away
Then it had when he ran, on that cold winter's day

From a town full of problems, he'd know leave behind
And he'd end up somewhere, where they couldn't find

No tlong after leaving, he was tapped on his shoulder
By his guardian angel, just hovering over

"Where is it you plan on ending up?"

"I'm not sure yet but it'll be better than this
But I most push on or my train I will miss."

"Your problems will follow
Wherever you go.
And your mother is sick
Young man, please head home."

"But this damn town will get me, if I stick around."

"If you'd change your perspective, you'd see another side of this old town.

You're young and confused and running away
From the people who love you and want you to stay."

"But I've spent my whole, the unwanted bastard son."

"Tell that to your mother, who even of her death bed,
Prays desperately for her loved ones.

Now hurry home quick and start sharing your love,
With the poor folks in town, those who have none."

So he turned and began, the slow walk into town
While up in the heavens, God smiled down

On a son once lost, who had now become found
And the love he would show, the once run down town.