Her Smiled Warmed My Heart and Her Words Spoke of Hope

I've been running for so long looking for a safe place
But discomfort never seems to far behind
I'm hiding in the shadows looking for a glimpse of hope
And out the corner of my eye the sun does start to show
So without looking back at a starless past
I run into the warmth of the brightly glowing one

Sing Once for Me

Give me a reason to leave but I won’t take it
At this moment without you, I wouldn’t make it
Try with your might to push me away
But an opportunity is all I can say
The moment so sweet with you in my arms
But I want your trust, I promise no harm
My heart in a box, I offer and ask
For you to take it, but not just to smash
The angels in heaven could sing me a song
But a day without you, I’d still feel all wrong
The smile you see, you placed on my lips
And the words I bring now, I ask not to twist
The moments with you are precious but few
And I recall every moment as if it were knew
My ways are not perfect but for you I would change,
My life for the better, if you’d still feel the same
So sing once for me and hold your hand
In a second I’d take it and not let you land,
Alone on the floor with no where to turn
I promise my darling together we’d burn
These words said in honest I give now to you
And please take my honor, that these things are true.

Maybe They Will Sing for Us Tomorrow

This is a piece I wrote while listening to the new Hammock record.


"Moments feel endless, as angels pass unaware
Their songs once filling heaven, now stifle in dead air
We all mourn the passing of a day long since gone
The mouths of the poets echo confused song
Still I whisper a shout that is heard by not one
And I keep coming back to a love holding on
Creep though I may, through broken hallway glass
I want just to be near, though not to see when I pass
Mistake of my heart, mistake of the day
From beginning of Winter, till this day in May
My footsteps are heard in the big empty house
A look and a smile and I feel like a louse
I fix my gaze away, ashamed and despaired
But in the moment of stillness, there’s forgiveness in the air
With tear filled eyes I run through the streets
A new joy in spirit, no sense of defeat
With the dawn of the day, the rise of the sun
Comes a moment to redeemed my life I have ruined
Maybe there is hope through my sorrow
Maybe they will sing for us tomorrow.

At 5, The City Sleeps

I wish the night would last forever
And I would hold you in my arms
But the mornings dawn is closer still
Alas my love, I leave at will
Knowing come tomorrow's sun
It's your eyes my mind's set upon
And I'll wait until we meet again
To hold once more my love and friend

A Song for...

"You are grace in understanding
A whisper in my pain filled world
The joy that takes my breathe away
A light amid the pearls

The love shines through at night
And in his heart, you take delight
An angel smile across your lips
And my life feels so alive"

I Feel in Love on a Metro Train

As conversation died on that rainy night
We rode the train north ward, to conclude our time
The drone of the engine and coffee breath
You lay your head against my neck
In silence we rode sitting close to each other
And I would not have asked for another
To share this moment with this eve
Then the pretty young girl sleeping next to me.

Lament

Time has brought me back to this empty pier
Where I first set sail so many years ago
To find a place I'd never seen before
Well all that time I'd left a love ignored
Her once star lit eyes have dulled with age
And her love for me and flame now dead
As we faced each other this one last time
We both can see that our love has died
And I the murderer that faithful day
When I left her heart at dock on the bay.

Lost in Paris

Salvation is here but you fled the scene
And I look for a friend but all I find are these four walls.
The freedom you spoke of has yet to arrive
I just feel trapped and lost inside
This great peace hasn't shown up yet
And freedom in Christ, seems choked out yet
There's a glimmer of hope at the end of each day
If only someone was around to cast it my way
I know there's something more in this life with Christ
But you abandoned me to a church full of flies
And I'm looking hard, and harder still
To find this powerful God and his will
But this place is full of hypocrites and liars
And my sin to them makes me stink of bile
So I pray and pray and I call out to God
To save my soul from being a fraud
And bring me into amazing grace
I'd feel you shining down on my face
I know you're out there and so much more
Then this four wall black mail, chains on doors
So far I flee from this wicked place
And finally I find your sweet embrace

Nothing in This World Feels Right

"It seems every minute spent away is a moment to many
And this night I have seen that my moments are few
So I sit on the edge of this beach you have made
Praying for hours that you'd take me away

Take me away to land far away
Something like Oz that most people call heaven
A fairy tale love in a fairy tale world
With a preposterous God
That I'd call mine own"

Tears of an Angel

In a garden over grown
I'm sure I've seen it all
And I sit wondering to myself
Is this it?

Then I look up by the rose bush
To see an angel alone
And as I venture my way closer
I hear her tiny sobs

I sit down right beside her
Not knowing what to say
She's a broken angel
And I'm just a man

The moment lasts for hours
As the sun makes it's way to bed
When she finally turns to me
And lays her precious head.

In her rest I see quite clearly
Why she was crying all alone
She's my guardian angel
And I'm her broken boy.

New Stuff... well semi new stuff

I haven't taken the time over the past week to post anything new so here you go.

Early thoughts while taking a walk on a cold morning
"Around every turn I take
A cold wind smacks me in the face
Just like you did that night...

And I swore my love, that I'd have revenge
For the mockery you did make of then then
But... that thought was quick fleeting.

For how can I hurt your pretty face? "


Stars
"Explosion in the night, sent tiny stars a flying
All around the universe they sailed never knowing
Their final destination was meant to be
A piece of hope that glimmered in my life "


Every Now And Then I'm Inspired, Despite my Present Outlook (The Fear is What Keeps Us Here)
"A calm rains falls at my feet
And in a distance memory I see
Her face that very faithful day
When I released the feelings held

Her words still hit me like a knife
A cold mantra practice over time
And I'd heard these very words before
From the same lips that spoke them now.
A cold shade of blue filled my room
And all that was beautiful, broke in full bloom

And though I'd never seen an angel cry
I've heard the devil laugh many a time
And it was that moment she spoke to me
Maybe, someday, just wait and see. "


Nothing More Then a Pretty Face
"At face value she was nothing more then a pretty face in the crowd
But there was a passion, a fire, behind her beautiful eyes.
It seem such a shame, that at such a young age
In the form of a man, her song was taken away.
Pain grew with age, the hurt inside of rape
She said “**** the world” and at her bed she lay.

But Lord from on high, came down to her side
And breathed in new forgiveness and completeness inside.
Awaken she found, her poor heart restored
And a love that she’d thought, was dead on her floor.

The smile shines brighter, then I’d seen before
As she walks hand in hand, with her lover, The Lord. "

Innocent Girl (Do You Even Exist)

She tortures me with her sinister smile (but oh how beautiful it looks tonight).
And I scream for this to end as her stare lingers just a second longer.
And she's out the door but it's to late
She's got my attention and it's killing me
This beautiful one, this evil one
The girl will be the death of me
But we'll never find out....
She's gone and I'm alone, another one of her tortured souls.

Like playing second fiddle in a two fiddle band

"No Clearance" the sign read,
As she walked away shaking her head
Once again she's been past over
She's waiting on a train to take her away

Once upon a time, she'd of been a queen
And people from the around the world would have come to see
The beauty evidence through her life would show
In all the world her greatness would grow

But she'd been rejected for the last time
No more living outcast and damned
The trains arrival, her ticket out
Of this cruel world, to heaven she's bound

Faith Expressing Itself In Love

I thought for a long time about the things I would say
But the word that came were just a spare memory
And how would express this thing
The joy in my heart, that makes me want to sing (not that I'd actually do it)

Love them were the words that made the most sense
So I put down my pen and left hoping for a chance
To meet someone new and show them a side
Of a new kind of humanity, with Christ's love inside

I Don't Believe You (She Acts Like We Never Have Met)

On a cold December night
We sit outside her favorite restaurant
Chain smoking with all the vagabonds
Singing all our favorite Dylan songs
And I plead into her emerald eyes
"Doll please don't go!"
Yet her moves betray the very words
She spoke to me the night before
"It's not for long, my dearest one"

Conflict

"The only thing worth writing about is the human heart in conflict with itself"
William Faulkner


Early morning thoughts while taking a walk in the cold

"Around every turn I take
A cold wind smacks me in the face
Just like you did that night...

And I swore my love, that I'd have revenge
For the mockery you did make of then then
But... that thought was quick fleeting.

For how can I hurt your pretty face? "


Going Remorselessly to Hell with a Piano

"In spite of better judgement I let her take me by the hand and led me out the door
This night will end badly but I need her like a newborn to their mother
And though come morning I will forget the reason why
I let her lead to the back alley bar that Satan himself owns.

Through the door I see that evil grin as the devil pours another shot
And though I shouldn't, I accept it willingly
Tonight let's feast like kings because the reality of tomorrow will just depress me.

She leads me to the corner booth that just last week I swore I wouldn't be back to
And with the sweetest voice I've heard tonight she whispers "Kiss Me"

And I offer up a simple prayer, 'Lord please forgive me"

See I know where this night ends... "

Sex is a Tragedy That Ends in Heartache

We took a trip to the city
All the girls outside were pretty
But I had the most gorgeous one of all right beside me.

Then we took a trip to the country
And there were butterflies a plenty
But their beauty paled in comparison to you.

But beauty is not what I care most about
So I planned this little trip
To see if there was more to us then making love

And what I found is I'm a weak man
And I saw that your a hypocrite
That only praise God when it benefits you the most.

So what to say to a former love
Whom I know this won't end nicely
But alas I step aside and break her heart

And she ran off to foreign countries
Where she would one day get married
And I stay at home and spent the rest of my life alone.

I regret, not a single moment I spent without her
For the silence let me spend
Some much needed time with my precious Lord.

Send More Stars

It seems to me that what I have in a discipline problem
But Lord I can't figure it out on my own
So I sit under the stars and meditate on the name
The saved my life from death and and the grave
But that day seems for very far and changed so much
And I continue to fight with this idea of you
And who I'm supposed to be in you
And I don't agree with the rest of thee
Who claim to be just like me
But they don't get the ideas I see...

...if it was happiness I had really wanted I wouldn't still be here...

But I am and that means there's more to this !

So I must confess it feels pretty hopeless sometimes
And my ways seem so far off track with what you did
But give up shall I not, for I fight the fight and push upstream
Because I'm not the norm in their church philosophy

But... that's not why I'm here anyway.

p.s. Send more Stars.

When I Didn't Run, She Turned Away

There was whiskey on her breathe and death in her smile
And she held my attention, if only for a little while
And so I left her there in South Berlin
At the wall dividing river states
And the song she sang as I raised the sails
Was not one to contemplate

See it was that girl who played with my heart
So I had to run away
From her beautiful smile and heart breaker eyes
That would steal the rest of my days.

Shakespeare wasn't far off

All the world's a stage
Though I'm not great actor
But I have one hell of a mask
And when it's on you'll never even see the real me
And that's just how I like it, I'd much rather hide
Because on the inside I'm mighty flawed
And I'm not sure I want you to see what's really me